Season 8 -Episode 51: Navigating Relationships -When You Don't Live Up To Expectations

In this kick off episode of Season 8, E-Money and Big Stew tackle the gut-punch of realizing your partner (or you!) doesn’t live up to the fantasy. 

From pop culture illusions to real-life heartbreak, they break down how to navigate the gap between who you are and who your partner hoped you’d be. 

With insights on honest conversations, reframing expectations, and real growth, this episode offers a candid guide for when the ideal shatters—and how to move forward.

Chapters

• 0:00 Intro
• 4:15 Building the MSG Brand + Global Reach
• 6:38 Episode Intro
• 7:32 Papoose and Remy Ma sparked this convo

Transcript

Good Morning, Chicago and the rest of the world.

Welcome to the Money Sex Gen X podcast. I'm your host with the most, the man with the plan. The Scotty Pimping podcast Pimping. All right, baby. I'm joined by the Rahi Wallace podcast. Knowledge. My homie, my brother, my co-host, big Stu.

Thank you, Robin. Thank you Robin. Up man. Man, let's get it in, man. Live our first live episode, you know what I mean? We got, we got a couple people in here working with us to the crew. Man. We got some experts in here helping us get it in. Yeah, our seasons. This episodes this season, man. This is. Eight, season eight.

It's eight. It sounds strange to say, but it's eight episode 51. It's a fun topic. They don't even know us. They don't even know us. Don't even know us. They don't even know us. We brand new to them. No question. No question. This is episode 51, 51. Go, man. Come on. Tell man. Stew. Where we at before we dive in though, brother?

How you been man? I've been all [00:01:00] right. I've been, I've, alright. It's been like a year before since we did the episode. The last episode? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. What you been up to? I brought it back, man. Bettering myself. Okay. Tell me more. Spend time with myself all. It'll come out in the episode. All right. It's working on me.

I got you. I got doing that shadow work. That mirror work. All right. You know, now I'm about to work on just getting healthier, healthier, healthier as I get older. Gotcha, gotcha. Stay healthier. Okay. What about you, man? What's been going on? I've been doing cool, man. I'm doing all right for a old man. You ain't said old man.

You keep saying. Yeah, I look young, but I'm, I'm getting kind of old man. It's cool. I, you know, we gotta stop thinking that saying you old is bad. It ain't nothing wrong with it, man. It means you've been around and you're still here. Okay. That's how I see it. I'm gonna sit with that. Okay. I, I don't like, oh man, you okay?

All you know. Are you, are you unc Are you, are you og or are you Uncle og? Hey man, they gonna call, that's be unc regardless. At this point, no question. I'm getting the OG now. I getting og. Og, [00:02:00] okay. My mom was talking to me other, he said they calling him UNC now. Wow, okay. Money. You ain't even, he 35. They calling him UNC now.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I do notice the shorty is calling. I'm, I'm OG now. Og. Okay. I ain't unc. No. I'll take that. I'll take that. It's better than, I don't wanna be grandpa. I ain't ready for grandfather. Nah, I ain't ready for that either. Ready for grandpa. Yeah. Yeah. No doubt. Shout out to all the grandpas out there.

Shout out to you. No disrespect, grandpa. No, no. Dis. Now I gotta ask you about this as we keep it moving. I know you started, um, DJing. I did. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And I, and I told you man, I was hating a little bit. I'm not a hater, but I did hate a little bit when I saw that. So tell me a little bit about that.

Yeah, well, you know, and I'm, you know, hey look. We talked about it briefly Yep. In one episode. And I do remember you outside about that was one of the things we connected on, no doubt. But when I was 14, I wanted to DJ wanted to technique 12 hundreds. My mother was like, absolutely not. You need to bring that math grade up, you focus on them books.

I'm not investing. And that was 40 years ago. So in December [00:03:00] of 2024, in December of 2024. I just made the decision. Now I'm about to start DJing and I just been going at it just for the passion and love and I'm having a lot of fun with it, man. No question. You definitely doing your thing. Yeah, yeah, for sure.

Keep sending me those blends. This inspiring. You showed me a little something today, which I appreciate. So yeah, I'm gonna get there with you. Shout out to me Sac. Yeah, shout to me sack on the lessons. Mm-hmm. Shout out to uh uh, one of the homies, man. One of my former students, gave me the equipment to start a gift.

It was a gift. And so that was what got me started on that. And then Misac came through, gave me a lesson that I paid him for. 'cause he's a professional, no doubt. And, um, that's what it was, man. All right, cool. So you floated something I think we should do. So when we started going across the world during our show, we were talking about maybe you and I DJ a little bit.

Yeah, man. Come on, get the equipment. Let's, let's do it. We can start curating some stuff, man. Okay. I like that. Keep hip hop alive. No doubt. Hey, look, [00:04:00] MSG family. So we definitely want you to subscribe to our YouTube. Scott has that popping so Well we, we saying pop. We got, we got over, we got about 200 subscribers.

That's good. You need help us out. Yeah, we need some more subscribers. Yeah, we doing good. The content is good. Please light subscribe, share this content. It's absolutely dope. We won't let you. Absolutely. And we are streaming in 74 countries. That's unbelievable. 672 cities globally. So we are excited about that.

You can find us on Apple, Spotify. What's the other major streaming platforms? Uh, we're on Buzz, Buzzsprout, all that. YouTube, of course. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah. Okay. But please, if you watching, just hit the subscribe button. Yep. That that'd be dope. No doubt. Appreciate it. And we just started a Patreon. So listen, if you're out there on the audio, you know, like say you listening in France or Germany, we don't know who you are.

We want you to tap into our community. Let's take these conversations and move them over to the community. Keep having them. Yeah. Then we can find out who you are. [00:05:00] Yeah. Because it's good to know who you are, not only just who you are, but we wanna know your name, we wanna know your birthday, we wanna, you know, want, wanna know what you're interested in.

We wanna build this community. So we do need that information, but we, we know that it's not free, so. Trust me on this episode, we have a free downloadable. Yeah, if you could just share who you are, we'll let you download something based off this episode today, which I'm super excited for. No doubt. And I'm gonna mention this real quick.

So something else Stu and I are doing, say you are a professional out there, so you might be a psychiatrist, a lawyer, whatever, and you're like, listen, I'm dope at what I do. Yeah. But I'm kind of worried about being in the media. It's something I wanna do, but I don't know how to do it. Right. We got a package for you.

So what we gonna do, you talking about the package? Yeah. It's gonna work real smooth like this. So it's like you come to us and we put together an episode that you'll be in, right? So we do the episode, we shoot it with you, then we edit the episode, we cut up the clips, we distribute the [00:06:00] clips, we take the audio and distribute that globally, and then we do a press release.

Okay? So you're deep in the media after that. And then as we are going through the process, we'll coach you as well. And if you all. Where we are shooting, you have an opportunity to come and actually be on that episode. So that'll be dope too. Yeah. Yeah. So keep an eye out on that. All right. So let's get that a dope idea.

Let's get to the episode at hand. So this is episode 51, Stu. Um, the episode is interesting, so it's, you're not the person they imagined. What wouldn't you, what? You're not the person, Stu, what you mean? What you not person? You're not the person they imagine. They imagine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's heavy, right?

So you're not the person they imagine navigating relationships when you don't live up to the hype man. I mean, like, like, like they, that you sent a representative. They think you sent a representative, like when the honeymoon stage just kind of phase out, like who are you, what, what you talking about? All of [00:07:00] that.

Yeah. So they had you hyped up in their mind like, oh man, Stu, is this. Eric is that whoever. But then when they get in the relationship, it's not what they had in their head at all. Or maybe it is initially, and then it changes down the road. Now here's why I thought about this episode, Stu. So I was really locked in on this Remy Pappus situation.

Mm-hmm. I don't know if the younger people are keeping up with this. These are two old head rappers or Gen X. They're Gen Xs Gen. Right. I won't call 'em old. Um, they're in a beautiful relationship. Remy went to prison for shooting somebody. Mm-hmm. Papoose held her down with the baby. With the baby while she was in there.

So it was this beautiful love story. Right. I thought everything was good in it, but recently they started falling out on social media. Yeah, I saw that. Yeah. I went down the rabbit hole and started watching all the videos and all of that, you know, because I'm, I just couldn't believe it. Right, right, right, right, right.

But at the end of the day, and I'm not judging them right. 'cause I've been in the same situations, [00:08:00] was just not on camera like that. But here's what it boiled down to one thing. Disappointment. Somebody got disappointed. Both of them. They were disappointed. Disappointed. Two people disappointed in one another, and then they lashed out.

Not only were they disappointed, but then they lashed out and they finger pointing at each other. Publicly. Publicly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We need to address this so we can't judge. Right. So this happens every day. People we're in relationships, we disappoint. It don't even have to be romantic. It could be your homie, homeowner.

That's right, right, right. Family member. Family member, coworker, people that disappoint. Yeah. You talking about being a disappointment? Yeah. No doubt. Being a disappointment or, or having a disappointment. Right. You could be the person that's disappointed. Disa disappointed. Yeah. Disappointed in the child.

Yeah, that's right. The child being disappointed in the parent. That's right. Damn. Yeah. You're disappointed in your lady, your father, your mother, whoever it is. So I was like, let's do this episode and really talk about this in detail [00:09:00] and then talk about how do you navigate. How you navigate. Yeah. Yeah. So let's get into it.

All right. So Stu, I'm gonna ask you this to set it off. Um, the situation is like this, your flaws shattered the idea of who your partner thought you were or thought they wanted you to be. Right? So you're in this situation, have you had these moments where you knew you weren't living up to what your partner wanted you to be?

Whether it was a fantasy or just their expectation? Yeah. So, and, and, and there was plenty of times E where I set it up that way. I, I maybe did hype it up, you know, they got me hype me up. That hype me. Yeah. There was a time I probably did hype up myself, knowing that I probably couldn't match that. Oh, you didn't, knowing you couldn't match it.

I think there was a time, clearly, clearly, clearly. Alright. Friday. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Were you worried about the fact that you couldn't match it? Not at that time, but you knew it could come back later. But you asked [00:10:00] based on the question that you asked. Okay. Yeah. If I'm being honest, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Okay. You ain't never built yourself up more. Sure, sure. Knowing that you was kind of, we all have. Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'm just wondering, we all have, we all. Okay. But I think the piece is how many people can really admit that? That's a good question. Can you admit it? Can you admit that that's what you, did you been the one that's like male or female?

Even with like, I think even when you talk about with your kids mm-hmm. When it comes down to like, how was school for example? Yeah. Or how was your day? You know, maybe they don't want to say that they got into a argument with a friend. Maybe they don't wanna say that they talked back to a teacher. Yeah.

Right. So I think, uh, yeah, yeah, yeah, man. Like I think we all kind of don't tell the full story of like who we are, what we bring it to avoid maybe disappointing people. True indeed. And what does that sound like? [00:11:00] Like that, those moments, like what, what was said in those moments? I think I, for me, I've heard the question like, like, um, I thought we'd be somewhere else by now.

It sounds like that. Yeah, I've heard that. I thought you'd figured that out by now. Oh, that I thought you, yeah, yeah, yeah. Thought you figure, I thought you'd figure that out by now. Okay. Yeah. And you don't know this by now. Yeah. Yeah. You lived all this time and you Yeah, I'm gonna tell you. Yeah, I'm gonna tell you a few I heard.

You know, um, I thought you were different. Damn. Damn. Anybody heard that? I thought you was different. I thought you were different. Damn, you ain't different. You're the same man. Ain't different, right? I ain't different. No. So that wasn't nice to hear. Uh, I never thought you would do that to me. Damn. Anybody heard that?

That's hard to hear. Um, I thought you were better than that. That those are expectations, man. What These expectation way, way, tough. Fo man. Flag on the play. Flag on the play. [00:12:00] What, what, what? That's rejecting. That's almost like gas lighting. Tight. Yeah. Hold up bro. Hold up. Well wait till I tell you this one.

Uhoh. And you may have heard this one. You ain't really on shit. Ah, that hurts. That hurts. Somebody trying to hurt your feelings now. Right? You ain't really on shit. Like, it's like, you know, you, you portrayed yourself to be at this level, but you, you not really on it. And then here's the one that I think irritates me the most.

Um, you're really not who I thought you were. Damn. You not really who I thought you were. Damn. So those are, those are tough. Yeah. So you've heard a few of those to see, it sounds like. Maybe. Okay. All anybody else heard those or is it just It's us. It, it us all. Cool. Okay. Okay. All right. All expectations.

Okay. Expectations. Now what did, again, going back to that point, like. How much of that did I did, did you put out, did I put out there? Versus how much did [00:13:00] they build up in their own minds? See, that's what I want to get into. Am I responsible for what you put in your own head, with your own mind? I'm only responsible for what I plead up.

Right? So it's like I, if I tell somebody, oh, I'm a millionaire and I'm not, I'm responsible for that. Yeah, that's a lot. But if you put something in your own head, am I responsible for that? I thought you, I thought, but you can't. Oh, I, right. Right. You see what I'm saying? Like, oh man, that hurts. All that hurts.

Because there are those expectations, even when, even when you're just thinking about dating, like, you know, the expectation is that the man will pay, at least in my generation, as a Gen Xer. Mm-hmm. Sure. I don't know how it is for millennials. Do millennials, do y'all guys do y'all date? Do y'all, yeah. Do y'all pay?

Yeah. Is that the expectation that you pay? Expectation? Yeah. Okay. Well, that's a, that's a. Then I think the other part with that, just that scenario, paying for dates, like I don't always have it, [00:14:00] you know what I mean? Like, but Well, I think that's cool though. As long as you don't say you have it. If you tell, tell my friend I ain't got it.

Damn, do you do that? You be like, I ain't got it. I have. You said I ain't got it. I've said that. Yeah, I ain't got it today. You know what I mean? Like, damn, I don't have it. It's cool. I mean, you know, they can make a decision from there, but I didn't lie. And then they can say, well, I got it. Or they can say, Hey, I'm out.

It's cool either way. Yeah. That seem like it bother you a little bit. I should be avoiding it. I try. You don't wanna say that. I understand that. I don't wanna, I'll never wanna say I ain't got it. Okay. I wanna always have it. I understand that. And so maybe that part of that expectation is the one I build up.

So to their point, maybe I ain't there yet, but in my mind I'm trying to. Be on that too though. But I ain't See I'm saying it because I don't want you to feel like I'm always going to have it. Even if I do, you don't want to be relied upon. Damn what you mean, like not at [00:15:00] all or just in the dating stage?

No, I'm talking about like early dating, you know what I'm saying? Like we not married you trying to rely on me too fast. So don't, don't think I'm gonna pay for everything. I ain't got it. I act, you know what I'm saying? I got three kids, you know, I don't have it. And you can make your decision from there, you know what I mean?

So you would feel bad sanded in that situation as man? Second date? As as a second date. Second date. I got second date. Okay. I got third date, I got fourth date. And I done heard women tell me like. Even just saying I don't have it, it don't, it just don't sit well for them. Yeah. They like I'm, they like, just don't tell me like I understand.

Even they be like, I pay for woo woo. But you just saying it. You hoping they'll be your support and fill you out. But sometimes it just mess up your masculine perception. That's right. I agree. But e you are speaking on being broke. It's kind of turning me off a little bit, even though I can accept it and understand.

That's sometimes that's a tricky place. You don't know which woman you can say this or not to, or how you going to say it when you need to say it. That's a good point. And, and I think what, what I'm looking for as a woman who doesn't [00:16:00] mistake me saying I don't have it, I'm broke. Damn. I don't have it for this.

I ain't got it for this, but I got it for the rest of my life. The mortgage, the three kids, the car notes. Right, right, right. I don't have it for what you talking about. And if you're gonna base how we move forward based off of that, that's problematic. Kick rocks. That's problematic. Yeah. For me, this just me that, because I was as recently like, okay, here's a still's moment of transparency.

All right, let's go still's. Moment of transparency. Quite recently I was asked, well, no. Quite recently I realized in my dating experience that I was the side dude. I was the sneaky link. What? With just one woman. But with the women that you've been with the women that would find time to be with me, I'm the sneaky link.

Yeah. You side, dude, whatever woman, they starting categorize. Right? Right. So then the question became, did I enjoy being the sneaky link? Okay. [00:17:00] And the part of it was like, yeah, ain't no expectations. Right? Ain't no real expectations, no. I don't have to deal with those expectations. But you didn't know at first.

You didn't know you were the side dude. But when I realized, I realized that. No, I'm the side dude. Ah, man. Okay. You have to realize you the side dude. Yeah. Just by things that happen. You kind of know you're the side dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You the, you the side dude. You know, if you decide now. Fellas. Fellas.

Where my camera at? Fellas. Fellas, you better ask yourself if you, I'm not talking about if you married. If you're married this time I'm not talking to you. I'm talking to you dating millennials right now and Gen Xers. Are you the side dude? And why are you afraid of commitment? 'cause I've been married and divorced and start another relationship and started another re ba.

 So. I've been married, been divorced, been in another long-term relationship. Mm-hmm. That didn't work out. Okay. I have two baby [00:18:00] mothers. This is stool's. Moment of transparency. Play the music.

Yes, sir. You know what I mean? Stool overshare a little bit. We need to hear. Yeah. Right. So then at some point, you know, you going, you clear your space and then you get back out there and then you realize you, you think, but you decide, dude, are you the side dude? And why? Is it because I'm afraid of the commitment again?

Mm. Not meeting the expectations. Yeah. Yeah. What's the real reason? Do I not want the expectation? Right. Altogether Now, which, what conclusion did you come to? Hmm. I haven't come to one yet. And don't forget we got a Gen Z in the house that we can ask this question too. I want to hear what he has to say about this, about dating.

Would he be okay with being a side dude? Uh, no. You would not be okay with it? Well, in certain scenarios actually. Okay. Are you, have you ever been the side dude? Yes. Dang. [00:19:00] And, and how did you feel when you found that out? I felt, I felt weird, but it changed when I realized where, what my role would be. Okay.

In my benefits I would get Okay. By being a side dude. Okay. Expectations. All right. Expectations. Yeah. Let's talk about these expectations. Gen ZI like that. Okay. So have you ever been a side dude? Yeah. Yeah, I've been to side dude. Um, and, and, but unfortunately, you know, actually I almost got, uh, I don't know if I could say this on camera, but I could have been un alive by being the side dude in this one situation because the female was being real trifling man.

Like, she's bringing me in the crib and it's a guy that lives there. You know what I mean? And he, you know, he was the live wire, so if he had found it would've been a problem. But anyway, yeah. I've been to side do, but not always knowingly, [00:20:00] I think I don't really like that role, you know what I mean? Because it's like, if you're with somebody, be with them.

That's when you decide, you know what I mean? But sometimes you're in the situation and you don't know it, you know? So it's, I'm talking about knowing that this, I think at some point you gotta know, you can't, I don't even think that this, nah, look expectations, I would expect that us, us, right? Us guys that are listening to this content deal, like, if you don't know this, know this.

If you gotta pay attention to the signs you should be looking at, first of all, let's be honest with yourself, what you trying to do in this relationship. Mm-hmm. What are you looking for? Are you looking for to be monogamous or not? And then be honest with yourself from that, from there. Yeah. Like that's, that's just step one.

And so my point in that is like, you gotta know where you stand in this relationship. True indeed. For yourself or for whoever you're dealing with. One or the other. If not both. Now here's why I think this brings it back to the topic. [00:21:00] So the, the lady that we talked about, or the lady we're talking about, and so you find out you're the side dude, but that wasn't your fantasy that you had in your head.

You thought you were the dude. You thought you were the one, and then you find out you're the side dude. How does that change the dynamic once you find out that she would even do that to you or have you in that position? I've never been in that position. Mm-hmm. Okay. I've never been in that position because you gotta know where you are and you know, you gotta know, as a man, you gotta know your role.

You gotta know, well how you not know You lying to yourself. Now you disappointing yourself. Let me ask you something. You cheat yourself at this point. I agree with you, but what I'm saying is you didn't know you were the side dude. You figure it out. It's not like she told you. So now, how do you view her, even though you cool with being the side dude, but does your view of her change?

Yes. Yes. Okay. Yes, of course. Because you had an expectation. Mm. That's what we're talking about here. Yeah. Real versus [00:22:00] ideal. You have the expectations. So they, they didn't meet your expectation of them. Right. Right. Right. That's still on you. Right? That's still on You. Still on you. Okay. That's still on you.

You gotta, you know, okay. You gotta, you know, pay attention. Cool. Pay attention. Pay attention. Stop settling. Stop BSing yourself. Stop playing. Like, are you, why you wanna be in a relationship anyway? Mm. Why, why, why? You be in a relationship? Why do you wanna be in a relationship? Why? Like, that's a real question to the audience.

Like, why? Why you even want to be in a relationship? Yep. Why you dating at this age? Now if we talking to us, like, why are we even dating if we're not married? At this age. At this age, I'm not married. Yeah. And so, yeah, I gotta decide do I want to be single or do I want to be married? Absolutely. Now let me ask you something.

So you were dating again and you've been, you know, dating for many, many years. So do you feel like women have the same fantasy about who you're supposed to be? Or is it different? [00:23:00] I do believe that women build up whatever they wanna believe in their minds, and they roll with that a lot of times without communicating what that is to whoever they're dealing with.

But do you find that they're putting you in the same fantasy every time? Or is it different? So, lemme give you an example. Lemme give you an example. Some, some people get put into the, I want you to be my husband fantasy. Right? Whether you wanna be that or not. That's just what they always get. Some people get put into the, I just want you to, to love me down Fanta.

You know? Okay. Like, what fantasies are you getting put in? Is it consistent or different? I think for me it's been consistent. Like be the husband, the husband, fantasy, be my, be my, let's ride on to the sunset together. Okay, cool. And you okay with that? Being in that, that's the fantasy. I'm, I'm trying to hold on to that.

So you like that? I've been, I've been hurt. I've been, been hurt by it a couple times. I've divorced and then another failed long-term relationship. I'm a little, I'm a little jaded. Okay. [00:24:00] I'm a little jaded on that. Okay. You know what I mean? So I need to make a decision. All right. If you talk, you know, and, and that's the point that I'm making for the guys.

All guys need to make a decision. All guys need be all guys. Need to make all people, actually All people. All people. Because this does lie on to women a lot too. Absolutely. In, in my mind. We do have a young lady in the house, so Yes. Yes. I don't know if she's gonna say anything or not. So look, if you all are just tapping in, I hope she does.

If you all are just tapping in. This is the MSG podcast. This is the episode number 51. My name is Eric McCloy. I'm ho we're my homie. Big Stu. We're talking about you're not the person they imagined navigating relationships when you don't live up to the hype. And we're just talking about it. Like, have you not lived up to the hype?

What is the hype? What I want to go into? Now we do that. Yes. Before we do that, let's take a quick take a quick, yeah, there's, okay, cool. Because that's about the 28 minute mark. Yeah. We see, I told you I forgot all about it. [00:25:00] Stop. Actually, you actually said that, but I had, you probably didn't even know. Oh, okay.

That's, that was just on that one though, right? Yeah. It's literally just this one. So everything look cool the the set and everything. Yeah. All right. Cool. Cool. I'm listening. You know what I'm saying? I'm enjoying the sound. Okay. What I was thinking too, um, I'm gonna, I gotta look at this. I was thinking if we gonna be talking, I'm gonna give them the, the third mic that way so they can get the better audio.

Okay. But I don't wanna mess with you right now. Nah, that's cool. Just, you know, going forward, going forward. Yep. Okay. Because you know, last time we was at the other spot, the dude was in the background talking, so it'd be good to give him the mic. So going forward. Yeah. So, okay. Three, two, and, all right. So yeah.

Thank you all for tap. So listen, I'm asking the audience this question, right, that I just asked Stu, are you getting put inside the same fantasy every time? And what I mean by that, let's take the word fantasy out. Do you have the [00:26:00] same expectations that's getting placed on you every time you get in a relationship?

Mm. Or is it different? Which fantasy are you getting put in? And what fantasy are you trying to put other people into? Mm. Is it a consistent one or is it different? Just something to think about. All right. It changed with the person, you know, it changed. You feel like it changed with the person? Yeah. Okay.

All right. But I was thinking, like you said, if you can put in the same consistent fantasy, that means something that you're doing consistently, right? I think so. I I really think it's a pattern. It's different people taking you the same way. Yeah. I feel like you gotta be you at this point. Exactly. Exactly.

You coming off like you would get money, take you around the world type of guy, and they like, oh, oh girl, take you. And what if that's true? But you're not doing anything special at all. Far as what you mean not doing anything special? Like what if that is the expectation that they have of you, but you really just like being you.

What did you even get? Where did you even get this from? Because I'm just doing me. This is, this is what you meant. This is, [00:27:00] this has been me from day one. Like what part of me got you thinking that it is, but if this happening, something that is not. If it's happening consistently, this, there's something that you're doing, then what?

I wanna know what that is. I wanna, I like that take though. I wanna smile. Maybe it's something you might have to ask. Have nothing to do with wait minute, quick to, but I think that that's something to do with the reflection of who that person is. That's what I, you're, you're engaging with. So if that person is being consistent in who they, they're as an individual, that person that just shows what they lack in some of their relationships.

Mm-hmm. So I think that's more of a, what that person has to do with more or less than the other person. Okay. Yeah. I like both of those takes. It's like on one hand we need to maybe ask like, well, why did you think I was the get money, take you around the world type. You know what Im saying? Like, just ask them like, where did you get that from?

A lot of times what you'll hear with will be, well, I just figured then you come to this take where it's like I, that's what I, my dad was that. You know [00:28:00] what I mean? So I'm looking for that, you know what I mean? My cousin or whoever. Yeah. Like something I've made up right. My mind. Right. Or my mother told me that's the type of dude I need to have.

And I'm, and I'm thinking, guys, don't show up like that. Guys don't have these expectations of women that exceed much. Really our expectation of, you know, is very shallow and basic. We're not expecting them to be much more than what they present themselves to be in that moment. Now, I don't know if I agree with that.

Talk about it. Expect, yeah, we expect that. Talk about it. Talk about it. I mean like talk about it. I'm gonna say this and I dunno if people agree with this, but like first and foremost, we know that like your mother is probably gonna be the foundation of what you're looking for in a woman somewhere.

Somewhere in there. Somewhere in there. Absolutely. It might not be on the surface, but I found that it's in there somewhere. Right. So I think it is that, but also man, it's a lot of women that be like, yo, I couldn't meet this brother's expectations. He wanted [00:29:00] too much outta me. He wanted to have sex all day long.

Then he wanted me to cook breakfast and dinner and lunch, and then I gotta go to work and take care of the kids. I do think men, we do have a lot of expectations and see what I'm saying is while you might see that as an expectation, I do believe that that is a lot of how it's, I'm basing on how it's presented it from the beginning.

So if in the beginning that was the line, the hook, line and sinker, then I might do it. I might expect that all the time. And I guess that goes the other way. If I'm gonna always pay for every date, yeah, everything, then that does become the expectation. If you pay the first date, you paid the first, second, the third, then I guess.

Hey, could you get this one? He is like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait a minute. Yeah, you broke pattern. No doubt. You know, this ain't the route we run. Right. But also depends on, I think, the age of what you're dating. So you have to speak in terms of, you know, in your younger years, in your twenties versus where you are in [00:30:00] your forties and fifties, you do date differently.

Yeah. Um, I think it's a level of maturity and what you're looking for. Right. Um, so when you get a little older in your date, and even if the guy pays for the first couple of dates, if you're a more mature woman, you might say, Hey, I got it this time. Or you might initiate the date. So it just, it's me. Just say it's on me.

That's fine. I, I, I've had that a couple of times. I'm mature women, let me take you out this time. Yeah. No question. Like you, I got you. Yep. And not, and they insist. They insist. I'm like, all right. And at one point I'm like, cool. Another point like, man, that feels good. No doubt. That feels good. No doubt. It's appreciative.

That's, that's, that's great. That's great. They make us dig back deep into the water. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Right now you wanna do it. Exactly. No doubt. No doubt. Coins. Yeah. So it sounds like you've got a fantasy, you know, for yourself in terms of what you're looking for in your, in your mate. Yeah, mine. Yeah. I do.

I do. Okay. All [00:31:00] Don't you? I don't know. You don't know if you have a, I don't know if I would use the word fantasy. Why you put that word on me? We gotta go by the same.

We talking fantasy. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. And expectations. Yeah. Have some expectations. Where does it move into fantasy though? So we all got expectations. Fantasy is immature, bro. Nah, is it though? Fantasy is immature. Is it? Is it? So we got the expectation, but then it moves into this other realm of fantasy.

Is that immature? Is that kitty kiddish? I think so. I don't think so, man. Fantasy Disney did it to us. We talked about this before. I blame Disney, bro. Okay. Okay. Well let's do this. I don't like to tell people this and they be looking at me crazy, but I did mess with Scientology for a minute. Yeah. All right.

And a black person brought me in. It wasn't all that cult stuff that they were talking about, but they, they keyed in on word. So what does the word fantasy actually mean? Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. You have a, I don't know. I [00:32:00] don't know. Somebody, uh, research. Can we get somebody, can you, can you look up the word fantasy real quick?

Fantasy by definition. I just wanna make sure we Right. 'cause I, I think for me, I'm saying I think the fantasy is immature. It's like, it's like what you saw based on your parents, what they showed you, or based on what the media showed you. Okay. And if I really want to go there, I know this is, well, this has to be a 17 and enough episode for sure.

But, um, the number one program that teens, adolescents are watching today is, does anybody know number one program genre of programming? Adolescent Reality tv. Reality tv. Reality tv. You think it's reality tv. The faculty or activity of imagining things, especially things that are impossible or improbable.

Mm. So, okay, you can write up on that definition. Impossible or improbable. The number one programming watch by adolescents. You can do the science out there yourself is porn. [00:33:00] Mm. Okay. Okay. Impossible or impo. Wow. So look, now since you, that's, that's how you learn a relationship. But I'm gonna say this, that's how you learn a relationship that takes me into a whole different direction.

It's like a lot of adults watch porn though. So that's, is it fantasy or is that reality? It's a fantasy, but it's adults though. The fantasy is fantasy. And the fantasy is, okay, big kids, it's okay to have a fantasy brother. It's cool, man. Of course. Of course. My fantasy is being rich. Okay. On the beach with my woman rubbing feet, drinking cocktails, watching the sunset.

You know what I mean? And join each other's company. Yeah. Dope shit. No stuff. No doubt. No doubt. There ain't nothing wrong with it. Man. I, I just wanna get to the point. There ain't nothing wrong with having a fantasy, but it is when, but there's a but. Right? It is when you making an expectation of somebody else that's outside of you, and now you holding them in that regard, [00:34:00] okay, based on this fantasy that is improbable, okay, and unrealistic.

And now you set yourself up for failure from the gate. Okay? And now you just created your own misery and misery, and now keep it. I'm not going, I'm not going to do it. Here's where my mind went. I think that's a great take, but it's, I think we might need help to understand that what we want is not probable.

It's not realistic. It's not realistic. We don't know that sometimes if you got a young kid watching porn and they never had sex yet, they're gonna think that's what it is. You know what I mean? That's their framing for like what a sexual experience is because they haven't had it yet. So they're gonna be rolling into their first encounter with that expectation.

Mm-hmm. Versus a person that been having sex and then they watch porn. They, they kind of know like, okay, this is something extra. You know what I mean? I don't do all that. Right, right, exactly. You're based on hurt all that and, and, which is probably familial parents. Mm-hmm. And your surroundings. Yeah. [00:35:00] Yes, I would agree with that.

Okay. You say it again 'cause I, you are ba uh, you are based on your first experience. You are based on your, what you see, what you were exposed to. Mm-hmm. Relationships. How did your, how did you see your parents being in relationship? Mm-hmm. How did that, like, some people see, you know, arguing as a form of love.

Yeah, definitely. Yeah. That's a good point. He fighting like, you don't love me if you ain't, you ain't beat me. You must not love. He ain't, he ain't smack me around. I ain't showing no love. Like, yep. I, my love is bringing flowers. Like I, none of that because I'm trying. You asked a good question and he got me like, I'm gonna sit on that.

I feel like there's still a thin line between expectations and fantasy. No doubt. And some stuff seem basic, but we like, is that still a fantasy? Like, my mom cooked and clean a lot, but every woman might not want to do that. So me wanting that out, every woman, is that a fantasy or is that expectation off a woman that don't do that?

Exactly. That ain't who she's think, yeah, you want, [00:36:00] ain't you tripping, bro, but you, but to his AL'S point, it's like you might need help to understand that it is, you're, you're, it's a fantasy. Yeah. Oh yeah. You might need help. I thought it was an expectation, but it could be a fantasy. Right. Okay. Damn line.

Because that don't sound as, as fantastic. You just want somebody to cook and clean, but it might not be in their wheelhouse. So that that's not exactly, that's right. Exactly that part. This is a great conversation. So yeah, y'all out there tell us like what's your definition of a fantasy and like really what I wanna know is.

As you're moving out your everyday life, are you operating out of fantasies or expectations or both? Like how is your life set up? Because some people, I've seen it and I've seen some women do this their whole life is a fantasy, a lot of it, right? It is. It is not a lot of reality in there. And then you come into the mix, into the fantasy.

What you mean? What you mean? What'd that look like? The woman's life, man, I'll give you a good example, right? [00:37:00] So the Disney marriage thing, the, the Cinderella type mentality, people are really rocking like this and they're 30, 40 years old. Here's how I use an example. We did the episode about why do you wanna get married?

Yeah. And I think the conclusion that we came to is because really a lot of people are expected. To get married. It's not because they want to. What I'm saying is that fantasy starts when you're a child. Yeah. I blame Disney for you feel me? Then you got people out here spending a hundred K on a marriage.

That's crazy. That's going into fantasy territory because you're spending a hundred K on a marriage, but you don't have a house yet. You see what I'm saying? But you think that's what you're supposed to do. Exactly. So who am I to judge? That's how you've been programmed. That's how you've been socialized.

And that goes to my next point that I want us to talk about you all. This is a great conversation. So where are we getting these expectations from? We know we getting it from the media movie, so that's movie, social media, media, music. I think music is the one that kind of sneaks in there and gets you [00:38:00] into fantasy land and you don't realize it.

You know what I mean? Family and community expectations. Here's a big one. Past experiences, right? So you had a good or bad experience and that changes your expectations or your level of fantasy. Hmm. Right. Maybe you had a, a, now, I don't know if this is a, uh, episode for kids, but like maybe you had a sexual partner that was like really, really good in bad.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Far beyond anybody else. And so now if you've had that experience, when you go to the next person, you might be in fantasy land thinking that the rest of these women that you come in contact with are gonna be able to operate at that level, just as an example. Mm-hmm. What do you think about that?

Yeah, that's happy. Okay. That's happy. That's, ugh. Yeah, man, I'm speechless. That's more, that's a lot. That's a lot chemistry. A lot chemistry. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a good point. But I think [00:39:00] sometimes in those instances, sometimes those relationships are just that. Right. I think where we become, and we have our issues is we try to make those sexual relationships.

We fantasize that they can be more than what they are. And the reality is it was just sex. It was Right. Right. So, um, I think that's where, you know, those gray areas come in. I'm glad you brought that up because like there's these people that we all encounter where the chemistry is amazing, right? But now you're expecting that same level of chemistry with the next person that you date.

And it's probably not gonna happen. It may never happen again in life. You know what I'm saying? You met a female, that chemistry was from day one. Before you even got into anything physical, just the chemistry was, and now you like, man, everybody I date needs to have that. That could be a fantasy. You know what I mean?

Could unrealistic. Yeah. Can I ask y'all a question? What do you do if you fall in love with somebody and they not mean those things? Do you or do you try to work through it? [00:40:00] Was it, I, my question, that's a great question. Love, right? Like love, you gotta like love. What do you do? You try to lose that love or I don't understand.

I don't understand. I don't think love. Yeah, I don't understand that. Like, so, okay. I'm say, was it love, was it even love? Like, how did you even wind? No, no. You, you BSing yourself. You know what I mean? Like you didn't know you thought it was what? You, you was living in a fantasy. Okay. You was living in a fantasy.

No, I'm saying you, like, you okay. You love someone, like you said, you feel like you love or think you love someone. They don't match that sexual fantasy that you got from that other person. Right? Right. But you still love them. But right now you still, you know, they don't match that sexual, uh, thing. So, so, and you just like leave that alone or, you know, that's a great question.

When you say love, like what's your definition of love? Love that part. Your definition is, I'm just saying I don't wanna act like I'm giving the definition of love, but whatever each, this, each own when it comes to they not, I don't know if they're the same. No, that's a good question though, because like the one [00:41:00] person, you actually love them.

Meaning you wanna do everything you can for this person, that fantasy part. It's a level connection. Not be the person that you have sex with. That's not, that's not your wife. So you, you're equating sex with marriage and love and they're not always the same. You're lucky if you No, but he's saying What do you do though?

I'm telling them, I'm literally telling them, if they don't match your sexual chemistry, you probably should stop doing it. Even you guys. Nah, I don't agree with that. Depends what it depends. Whatcha talking about? I don't agree with. Thats are it depends on what your non-negotiables are. Like what is most important to you in the relationship?

Is this your wife? This a girlfriend? It's a hypothetical. Like just a hypothetical. What? Wife or girlfriend and somebody just dating friend. What? That's say girlfriend for now. 'cause you haven't got to the wife level. 'cause you're still thinking about the thought of sex. This is your man. This is your girl.

This is your girl. You're not dating. This is the [00:42:00] woman that you're moving towards marriage with. Yeah. See? And y'all, well you might be able to, you, you might be able to fix it. But they, everybody's gonna have to be honest about, they're non-negotiables. Like, let me ask this. Why do you have to fix it though?

It's like the, the, the other woman you got the sexual chemistry with, but she's not wife material. Then you got the lady that's wife material, but she's just not that sexually. It's cool. She is the issue. Um, so if you're dating too many people at the same time, you're really not giving one person. You're undivided.

Right? So you're not able to see clearly everything of the possibilities of what it is because you are wearing yourself two things. That's why I feel you on that book. That's why I'm the sneaking link. So, yeah, that's why it's happening. That's why I come back to being, but I'm, I wanna get into this though.

Like, what if you are only dating one person, you're only dating one person. But what ma I feel like he's asking is like, I'm dating the one person, [00:43:00] but they're not meeting all my expectations. Person. You, you got, okay, so then you gotta to get, bro, that might not be the person. That's not, that's not, you need to see.

I disagree with that. Whatcha saying? I disagree with that, somebody because of sex. But that's, I think that's because we said maybe that sex is just a fantasy that you had with their last person. Right. You gonna not be with this new person because they don't match that sexual fantasy. Again, is that something that you value in the relationship?

So everybody has what they value? Like, is that something that if the sex isn't good, like, oh I can't do this. Is that something you can, you know, say, oh, okay, well this person does this better, so I I'm okay with that. Yeah. So you have to decide what you're willing to settle with. I make some x their opinion, you know, I wanted y'all opinion on it.

My opinion on it is this, we gotta stop and I've been married three times, so I'm, I'm an expert in marriage. Okay? But I'm not, I'm not a good one. I'm not a good expert, you know what I mean? But I'm gonna tell you what not to do. We gotta stop trying to get the current [00:44:00] wife. To be with the girl that was so dope as sex was It's two different people.

It's two different people, correct. No, you were saying let it go. And I'm saying Nah, that's not She's wife. She's the wife. Your wife though, because she not as freaky as your freak, right? Girlfriend. Girlfriend. Well, yeah, I'm just saying like the person in the past, whatever the title was, but like he can't let go of that person in the past mentally, he himself, he, but you mentally is almost just as powerful as physically.

Mm-hmm. The brain doesn't know the difference. The brain doesn't know the difference. It's true. Right? So you still playing that in your head. We gonna have to, we need to address that. Otherwise, that partner of yours will never satisfy you. Never. And then you are miserable. We this feel like deja vu. Like I've said all of this [00:45:00] already.

Maybe you did at the beginning of the episode. I dunno. Get into it now. Now you get crazy. You know what I mean? I, no, I feel now you miserable. You're miserable. When I'm working on, I'm working on moving into this space of like real honesty with myself first. See, I think we are all saying the same thing in the sense because now you realize what happened with young lady in the past.

That's a fantasy. But you might not get to that level again. That's what you said. You did say that. Yeah, you did say that. So I gotta, I'm not gonna put that on my wife and trying to put an expectation on her that a fantasy now is kind of the question I was trying to bring. Yeah. I say it is now, it's okay.

I love for all these other ways, but she don't have sex with me like this other woman did. So it's like that fantasy now because that's expectations that. To not want be with your wife or your current girlfriend. I think it go forward with being, I think it is, it could be free as this thought that you have in your mind.

Maybe that, maybe that's just a face. Now you gotta get used to sex. Yeah.[00:46:00] 

You gotta use to normal sex. No doubt. That's a good point. That's a good point. Yeah. I like that. I like that. I like that. So, so this is good, right? Then mall brought that up because I feel like that's how you begin to navigate now, right? You gotta get into, you gotta be realistic. He still feel like he wants to know You don't feel like I, yeah,

no doubt. I.

It's a fantasy. All right, we're gonna do a check-in. This is MSG Money, sex Gen X. This is episode number 51. This is one of the best conversations I've ever had on this pod. So thank you all for joining in. Here's the topic again, you are not the person that they imagine. How do you navigate relationships when you are not living up to the height?

Okay, and we, we really got into this. So here's the [00:47:00] next part of this conversation, you all. So, um, ma was talking about navigating, which I love. Here's a couple of things that I've found doing a little bit of research. So first you gotta acknowledge there's a gap between reality and the fantasy, right? You gotta do that.

You gotta do, I might need some help, might have to go to a professional, but look, I got these expectations. They're not being met. Is this a fantasy or is it reality that's not being met? Right? So acknowledge the gap. Don't I like this one? I wanna know what mall thinks about this and you all too. They say don't downplay it.

So you had the amazing sex in the past. I think Stu was saying you need to get that out your head. But they're saying don't downplay it. Be honest with yourself and your partner about the mismatch. That sounds tough. Now that's tough, but that's important though. Sounds tough. You have to be in relationships where you can be authentic and, and, and be you and be heard, because if not, then it's not really built on truth.

Mm. And then you're always operating in [00:48:00] this fantasy space. Yeah, I like that. Um, the next one was like having honest conversation. Now this stuff sounds good in theory, but it could be difficult, right? So it's like you're sitting down talking to this person and you're trying to keep it real. Look, baby, I love you, but I had this homegirl like four years ago.

She blew my mind sexually. I. This is not meeting that now. You wouldn't say it like that, right? You wouldn't say it like that. You know what I mean? That's that sound that sound like some, that sound like a pimp or something.

That's why I've been married three times. I

don't take advice from me. Please. But, uh, you know, there's a reason.

You know what I [00:49:00] mean? But uh, yeah, try to discuss how it feels, right? If there's guilt, embarrassment, disappointment, try to do it. I guess. Might need some help. Again, somebody, right? I think these are good tips. Um, and the last one, like validate each other's feelings. So you drop this bomb on somebody or fellas, what if the woman dropped this bomb on you?

Yeah. Hey man, man was really giving it to me. You know what I mean? Like, are you gonna be able to handle that? You know, you know, that's where it gets, it gets tricky now. Yeah. I don't think, most men don't think we can handle that and I don't think most women would even bring that to us. 'cause they know we can probably can't deal with, she gonna ghost, you know what I mean?

Ghost. Yeah. She gonna ghost, she gonna ghost. So, yeah, it's something to think about. So the next one was like, reframe the narrative, right? So you could try to shift the focus from trying to measure up, to trying to focus on building a real connection based on what's [00:50:00] real, that part. Right. What you gotta say about that?

That's just, that's, that's just growth and maturity because I done had that at 17, 18. I wasn't on this. Sure, sure. This is growth and maturity people. That's all it is, man. Yeah. I wasn't on this last year, you know what I mean? So it's, it's, I'm 52. 52. I still ain't on it. You know what I mean? So it's cool. We all working on it.

Please, please don't Trying help you. Yeah. Trying to help you. Exactly. And maybe this, uh, here's another one I like. So highlight the things that are good and the things that you all do share. I've learned this. Now, here's one thing I learned from being married. You gotta find what makes your relationship,

oh, okay. Here's what I learned from being married three times. You gotta hone in on like what made your relationship work. I'm gonna give you an example. One of my wives, our, our [00:51:00] thing was two things, man. And we got away from it when we had seed together getting drunk and food. Hmm, that's what y'all was, that was our thing.

That was y'all thing. That was our thing. Because when it, when it got went away, we, we fell out. You know what I'm saying? I'm like, yo, what happened? She like, what happened? But that was our thing. Like we got so caught up in the kids, we didn't take that time to drink the little wine or the whiskey or whatever and eat the food.

You know what I mean? So I think that's important. Focus on that. Yeah. While you worried about homegirl from 10 years ago, you know, these are the things that, your current situation, what made it work and made it special. So I think that's really good advice. That's real good. Having that honest conversation.

Yeah, that's a good one. Now I got two more here I want to go through with you all. Beautiful conversation again. So like taking ownership and trying to grow. So if your partner's fantasy was unrealistic, now we gotta set some boundaries. And I think this is a big one, you all, we gotta set some boundaries.

So setting boundaries. You, you know, I can't do what Main Man was doing, the stuff you was [00:52:00] talking about. I can't, you can't do what homegirl was talking about. How do we meet in the middle? And set some boundaries. Right. Which could be a tough conversation, I think is helpful. Um, if there's areas where you can grow better, like, uh, communicate better, be empathetic, try to relate, um, commit to that growth without feeling like you are a failure.

So, so she comes to you and says, Stu, I need you to be X, Y, z. You know, you're not there. It doesn't mean you're a failure, it just could be something you choose to work on. Right. That's okay. It's not an attack. Doesn't have to be, doesn't now, it depends on how they say it. You know what I mean? It could be, I'm gonna say that.

So it depends on how you communicate with your partner too. Yeah. So you can make sure that you're heard and you receive. Absolutely. So it might not be a direct conversation if you know your person is a writer and they read books, leave 'em a note. Yeah. In their lunch or something like that, you know, find a way and they don't have to respond right away.

Right. So they don't feel attacked. Exactly. They can respond at their time, but give them a [00:53:00] moment to digest the information. Instead of wanting like a quick fix right now. That's right. So giving that grace as well. I love that. And this, I also want to add, I think that's a good point. I also want to add that we could all be a little more patient with each other and ourselves.

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Definitely. To that point where we, we are used to people responding instantaneously. Mm-hmm. And we kind of have to just be patient. They're people, busy, people doing other stuff. They putting together podcasts, they, they're not checking their phone or they just need to digest what's being said.

Yeah. So be patient. Definitely. That's a good one. And I learned that my co-host here is usually right about most things. So the last one on the list is something that Stu already said, and he said, it says, let go of the fantasy if needed. If needed. Yeah. You might need to let go of it, right? Mm-hmm. Uh, sometimes the fantasy just isn't going, it's just not gonna happen.

And that's okay. And then you're gonna basically take a step back. Try to find somebody that's more [00:54:00] aligned with reality. Mm-hmm. Not the fantasy. Think about that. Now, if you go outside and you trying to find somebody based on a fantasy, that's gonna be tough. Mm-hmm. That's gonna be a rough day. You know what I mean?

You going out the door in a fantasy, you know what I'm saying? That's tough going out. But if you say, you know what? I'm not going out there like that today. I'm gonna go out there based in reality. That's a different day Stu. Mm-hmm. It's a different day. Yeah. I like that. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. So I, you know, I like, these are practical.

I don't, I think we might need some help to do these, but I think they're doable. Well, we actually have help. Okay. There's a free download. Yes, yes. Um, that you can subscribe to and download and answer some of these questions. Take 'em to your partner or just answer 'em for yourself. But let's not ignore it.

I think this will help in all kinds of relationships. Parent-child relationships, into relationships, siblings, coworkers, cousins. I think business partners, it could probably help there. [00:55:00] Yeah. You know, but take, uh, inventory and this worksheet will help you do that. Absolutely, yes. Get that download and, uh, Hey Stu, man, I gotta congratulate you on just doing a great first live episode.

This is dope, man. Man, this was dope, man. Thank you. Yeah. And we give it up, but a, yeah,

this was good. This was good. Thank you to everybody. Yeah, no question everybody. Ms. G. Yes. MSG. And I'm gonna leave this with two things. So I got a burning question that we kind of talked about. So if we take this topic and ask the question, how do you bounce back when you don't live up to sexual?

Expectations or a sexual fantasy, you don't move up to the fantasy. How do you bounce back? How do you bounce back from that? I think that's a great question. Huh? You gotta get in the gym. Get in the gym, get libido up. Yeah. Or Cameron got that pink horsepower, you know, I might have to get that, you know what I mean?

To help out, you know, [00:56:00] but, uh, I know brothers, we don't want to hear. We didn't, me, we didn't measure up sexually. But it's something to think about. And ladies, you know, there's times where you all don't measure up sexually. I know that's a rough way to say that, but, um, sometimes it's just not what we want or what we feel like we need.

And so think about how you can bounce back from that, you know, and move forward. All right? So look, peace to everybody who came out and supported the show. We taking this to the next level? Yeah, man, me and Stu about to start doing these events where we bring in a bunch of people for a networking event, drinks and music, absolute with DJ and all that, having experience that's coming.

Soon we gonna partner with ma and others and make this happen. Um, we got the streaming audio. Join us on Patreon. We want you get the download and yo get ready for the next episode. Absolutely. Let's come sir. Alright. What's the name of this studio? Create Victory Studios. All right. Shout out to create Victory Studios.

Yes. For hosting us. Absolutely. Looking forward to doing more work with Creative Vi, create Victory Studios. Yes, sir. No question. And uh, [00:57:00] yeah, man, come through. It's a great setup. Very relaxing. Got a great host. Come through, definitely find 'em all you on Instagram, all of that. Yeah. Find 'em all ig, come through, get your pod done.

It'll take a lot of work off of you. This has been the easiest we've ever had to do with a setup. Amazing. So I love that. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. All right. So until next time you all. Peace.

Thank you.